Back to Work

Three weeks before José died I took redundancy from my job of five years. The a charity was downsizing and redundancy gave us a chance to spend time together enjoying days out as well as getting to specialist appointments, researching activities José could get involved in and preparing for our house move. After my three months redundancy package expired we would be in our new home and I could (hopefully) find a job closer to home and with some flexibility as circumstances required.

Of course things never work out as planned, so instead I found that redundancy gave me a few weeks breathing space to get things sorted. Stop the move and arrange for the return of various pieces of medical equipment. [note: other pieces remain in the garage almost a year on].

There were many challenges to finding a new job. Brexit didn't do wonders for the stability of the charity market and I wasn't really in the right frame of mind for the unprofessional precedent of the Job Centre. ["We've made an appointment for you at 12pm on Thursday." "I can't make 12pm as I have an interview with an agency." "Well the appointment has been made now, so you'll just have to come in late."]

I was strict with myself to get back in to a routine. Get up at a set time, walk the dog, then look for jobs on various online forums. Walk the dog and then work on applications. I needed to apply for three jobs a fortnight - not that anyone asked for evidence. I'm not sure how people in careers change jobs, to refine a good application was a good week's work - where do people find the time?

I was fortunate and relatively quickly found two part time jobs (well one found me) which allowed me to keep my options open, especially as both were initially temporary.

The hardest thing about starting a new job after José died was the feeling that I was leaving him behind. Working for a cause that he had no concept of, going to places and seeing people he had no idea existed.

Both positions are now well established and less temporary. I can barely remember my old job which had been all consuming at the time. However I can still remember José, I haven't left him behind after all.  And even though he doesn't know the places where I work I still tell him about my day and think about what he would say. I hope he'd be proud.